#i don't really have a good explanation for this i just saw the quotes together in a post and it took hold in my brain

[theotherrichardpapen]

There has to be a way. To care for the wounds without reopening them. To name the pain without inviting it back to me. - Richard Siken, Crush // Lora Mathis

[nisuna]

Edit: I have since posted the fic, check it out here!!

hi hello, so this isn't my official "comeback" yet as I'm currently sick in bed 😭 so this is just a little teaser and explanation of what I'm planning hehe

So I've had this idea for a long time, so long that it was the first fic I ever wanted to write down on this blog and the idea that motivated me to start writing in general, but things happened so yeah I'm only now finding the time to finally write for it

so basically, it's friends with benefits geto x f!reader, simple enough, right? Well, not quite (if you're not interested in too much detail, feel free to skip my rambling and scroll down for some excerpts and quotes 😘 they'll be below the cut)

It all happened one evening when your best friend came to pick you up from a party for the first time, being tipsy and sexually frustrated one thing led to another and you slept together and from then on it kind of became your guys' thing

Whenever you were out and didn't end up with someone, you called him and he actually came to pick you up

You've known each other for a few years but you just couldn't get yourself to call him Suguru, it's always Geto this Geto that, even tho he would really like you to just call him by his first name, but you're like no no no nonono I can't

And if that wasn't bad enough, your tipsy self always added -san, so it's Geto-san whenever he picks you up haha

You've done a lot already, anything dirty you could think of, been there done that, but no kissing bcs that's too intimate duh, like having a dick shoved so far up it's rearragning your guts isn't yeah yeah sweet denial

So this time there wasn't anything unusual about it, he picked you up like always and you were down to fuck so what's the worst that could happen?

he miiiighhtt make you call him by his first name and maybe just maybe you do finally kiss???!

I'm also down for maybe a prequel to the first time it happened?? 👀👀

But in any case, enjoy an excerpt from the beginning as well as some of my ideas and quotes I plan to include :D

He never understood why you liked going out to the most shabby and stuffed clubs. It reeked of alcohol and smoke mixed with all kinds of bodily fluids. As he was making his way through the dancing crowd of sweaty people grinding against each other, he finally found you sitting at the bar while some guy was leaning in your direction way too close for comfort.

He had his usual fit, hair half up with a black over sized sweater and loose black joggers. Making him look so huge that if there were any guys bothering you, they would leave you alone as soon as they saw him.

"Yo~ y/n", he touched your exposed shoulder and gave you his signature eye smile, before staring down the guy next to you that was trying to get in your pants or in this context in ypur skimpy little dress. The guys' annoyed look turned into a worried one after seeing who he was up against.

"Aahhh Geto-saannn you're here early" you mused, leaning against his hard chest. That damn honorific, he cursed but still managed to squeeze out a smile.

"Haha "-san", so you aren't her boyfriend then." the stranger snarled but soon gave up as Suguru raised an eyebrow at him and snapped a "watch it". "Alright, alright, I give up", he put his hands up in defeat. "Maybe next time, sweetcheeks."

As soon as the guy left Suguru took both of your hands in his and knelt down in front of you. "Y/n we've talked about this, if you don't want to call me Suguru at least drop the honorific. We've known each other for years now don't you think it's about time. Also, don't you think it's weird when you call the guy you fuck by his last name, hm?" He turned his head looking at you expectedly.

"But Geto-saaaan-"

"Ah ah, what did I just tell you"

"Okay okay, Geto" you huffed, "You know I'm not comfortable with that", you whined, squeezing his hands.

"I just want to hear you say it at least once. Say it and I'll fuck you real good tonight.", he smirked.

You considered it, after a hard week you really needed a good fuck. "Sugu-", is all you could manage before snapping your head away, "Nope can't do it."

He let his head drop with a loud sigh. "It's alright. It looks like I was just pushing my luck. C'mon, let's get you out of here." And with that, he rose back to his full height, grabbed your hand and pulled you from the bar stool. While making your way through the crowd and to his car, your thoughts kept wandering.

Suguru... that's such a pretty name.

----------

"What's up with you today? If you keep squeezing me that hard you might actually snap my dick off.", he chuckled. He's way to cocky. You have to do something about that.

"Have I ever told you how annoying you can be. If you don't stop talking, I think I might have to shut that mouth of yours up myself.", you whispered putting your hands on his cheeks and pulling his face close so that it was right in front of yours.

--------

"Is it okay? Does it hurt?"

"No, it feels really good. I can feel you all the way up here", you smiled, leaning back and tracing your fingers from your pubic bone to just over your belly button.

"Fuck, you can't just say those things out of the blue" he mumbled sitting up, finally starting to pound into you from below.

"Wow that did it, huh?" you chuckled arching your back and clawing at his shoulders. "How naive, men are so simple." you kept that thought to yourself tho.

----

"Wait", you mumbled against his lips. "Don't pull out. Keep fucking me. Hurry up." How could he say no to you, even if he felt like he was about to die from overstimulation, he couldn't possibly deny you.

-----

"Fuck, I'm hard again"

"Then keep going."

-----

Look forward to the whole thing as soon as I feel better🙈🙈🙈 and feel free to let me know what you think!❤️

[wistfulnightingale]

The Chess Moves Theory Set -- Why Chess & Magic? (A Final 15 MetaTheory)

The Final Episode of Good Omens S2 is full of moments that caught our attention. We cried, we rewatched in disbelief, and some of us generated speculation and theories. Yet it remained difficult to find a solid "other" explanation for everything that occurred. Maybe it really was an incredibly painful breakup. The Ineffable Divorce.

Speculation about any one of the key moments, looked at individually, leave gaps and questions and uncertainties. But together, they might propose a different picture. I think it's a piece by piece jigsaw puzzle, or the sequences in a Regency Era dance, or --- A complex game of chess.

Over many months, I've put together a set of 8 scenes/theories, Eight Chess Moves that, together, might prove that what we saw wasn't all there was. Some might seem exciting, some might seem bonkers. Personally, I think there's reasons (or sometimes even proof) for each of them, or I wouldn't propose them to you. I've listed and linked each one below. I hope you'll at least enjoy them!

Now, I'm not a skilled chess player, not at all. But The Metatron is. He's a Chess Master (at manipulation), and Our Ineffables have had to quickly develop their skills, anticipating moves and creating counter moves. Hopefully they are skilled enough to shift the board and win this deadly game.

Like Fell the Marvelous Magician, flicking the envelope after the incriminating photo has been tucked away, magic and Misdirection are also used. Misdirection means that the magician is not "hiding" the trick -- they convince you to start looking for the trick after it's already happened. Magicians Penn and Teller are quoted as saying, "The strongest lie is the lie that the audience tells itself."

This Masterclass article on What Is Misdirection in Magic tells exactly how it's done:

Social Cues -- Look where they look, not where we should look

Multitasking/Split Focus -- Distractions

Patter -- Rapid talking & questions (Lookin' at you, Nina!)

Emotional Manipulation -- Yeah, that Crowley moment with Nina

Time Misdirection -- It already happens before we know to look

Convincers -- Someone validates that everything's normal

Repetition -- We get used to seeing something, and don't question it anymore

I'll be refering to most of these in the theory breakdowns, since they're a huge part of how a lot of this managed to sneak under our radar.

The Eight Chess Moves Theory Set:

1 - The Metatron Misdirection

2 - The Metatron's Second Coming

3 - Ineffables in Check

4 - A Hefty Jigger of Death

5 - Nothing Lasts Forever

6 - The Circle Kiss Theory

7 - The Nightingale DID Sing

8 - Aziraphale's Jubilant Smile (NOT the crazy elevator grin)

(Please go to @wistfulnightingale for my pinned post if these aren't linked up here! My Apologies! I've been scurrying to get it all linked)

No single chess move on the board wins a match. It is the series of moves, each decision, each part of the strategy, that leads to the victory. For nearly a year and a half, the fandom has been analyzing various scenes that raised questions in our minds. We get closest to figuring it out, I believe, if we look at all those mysterious moments together. None of my theories is convincing if it stands alone. However, as a SET, each leading to the next, they might make a more compelling case for the moves and countermoves that were happening in S2.

The opening credits sequence has a lot of clues about Magic in it (like rabbits Everywhere!!), letting us know that Magic is gonna be important in S2, as detailed in @sendarya 's YouTube video:

Good Omens Title Sequence, EASTER EGGS and hidden clues uncovered!

Interestingly, I think we've actually also been told to look for a chess metaphor, just as we were given clues to look for Magic Tricks. There are chess pieces and a chess board visible behind Crowley (next to the fateful grandfather clock!) in much of the end of E6. And earlier, in E3 when Jimbriel is swatting at the fly and demonstrating gravity, we are given a very clear shot of the book "My Best Games of Chess."

That same book is also featured several times in the 1946 Powell and Pressburger movie "Stairway to Heaven," as @sendarya noticed. (The multiple connections of chess and "Stairway to Heaaven" with S2 is wonderfully explained in another YouTube video by @sendarya ,

Good Omens Love or Law, which is stronger?

I highly recommend checking it out!) The movie poster on the left for "Stairway to Heaven" is seen twice in Good Omens S2, in the opening credit sequence (seen below) and in Maggie's record shop.

The poster on the right also shows the movie's U.K. release name, "A Matter of Life and Death." As fun and fluffy as Good Omens S2 began, the reference to this other title becomes too fitting for our Ineffables by the final episode.

The Chess book and the repeated presence of the movie poster certainly seem to mean Something. The video by @sendarya is what inspired me to look at all the mysteriously odd moments of S2 as related parts of a Chess Game, "A Matter of Life and Death" between the Metatron and Our Ineffables. Each moment looked at alone just leads to more questions. Together, they might start to make sense.

I hope you enjoy all of the parts of my Chess Match Theory Set. (I've been neurotically pondering and examining and rewriting this stuff for months!) Hopefully, these ideas are still consistent with Terry Pratchett's ideas for where these two characters who began as one will end up. I'm hopeful that I'm onto something here, but I also hope (tentatively believe?) that the plot they suggest still fits with the Rescued 90, the Finale of our Ineffable Adventures. And, if I'm mistaken, at least it gives us something to talk about in the meantime!

Thanks for coming with me on this crazy ride!

To Our World!

[intertexts]

GOODMORNING ITS TRIVA TIIIIME

EPISODE 29 TRIVIA:

- they actually rerecorded this episode. bizly wanted dakotas lesson to be strategy so ORIGINALLY they were fucking. playing chess. for two hours. according to charlie "they had chess dot com open. I don't know where condi was but I was physically prone on the other side of my room like hiding behind something" SO THEY HATED IT. AND THEN RERECORDED IT AND ENDED UP WITH THIS.

- DAKOTA IS OFFICIALLY 18. HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY. really funny that this happens in the hyperbolic time chamber where time in the real world doesn't actually move.

- THERES ART FOR THE BOULDER THING !!!! ITS AWESOME I LOVE THEM

- grizzly: "in the beginning were you guys told to tell me that you were quitting the Prime defenders?"

condi: "no, not at all. that just came out naturally I think"

charlie: "I was so sad to see how heartbroken dakota got at that"

EXPLANATIONS:

condi: "I mean vyncent doesn't really... get it. a lot of hardship has come from being the prime defenders I don't think he sees it as worth all that. dont worry i dont think this is a permanent state of mind for vyncent, hes a malleable little boy, but its where hes at right now. itll change with time but right now hes a little jaded"

charlie: "williams whole plan was, now that he's basically wisp-free and given a new lease on life (< side note. phrase that causes me harm specifically) his plan was to find a way to return this smoke soul and help save ashe and then after that.. who knows"

- dakota ended that scene with "I never wanted to do it alone" and that's what gave him the idea to have them help him with the boulder. he didn't want to do it alone

- the only reason william is still here at all is because of dakota and vyncent. if they weren't here he would've been gone ages ago

- YIPPEE. YOU GET TO SEE JASON ORIGAMI FINALLY. 3/3 OF THE PRIME FORCE COLLECTED. HI JASON <3

- THEY KEEP QUOTING ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN IN REFERRNCE TO WILLIAM. DO THEY WANT ME DEAD.

- chaos beano :]

- cue anime talk for like 10 minutes. prime defenders the weeb podcast ever <3

- OK AWESOME. BIZLY TALKING ABOUT THE CHAOS DEMON: "the way it kinda works is like... the chaos demon lost all sense of personality. yknow it was a soul at one point, but the longer you're in a place like where he was, you just lose what makes you you. imagine you're in a place where people are screaming all the time and you don't even know if the screams are coming out of your own mouth and it's just eternal nothing and everything (< horrifying!). and then when he latched onto you, dakota, it became like feeding off of your negative emotions"

- "What is dakotas worst fear personified? Who is dakota afraid of the most?"

grizzly DOES NOT ANSWER THIS >:| however he does say "it was a really good choice to show him the fall right away. had he not turned into le frog I think I would've played dakota a lot more serious. but because it went from the fall to doug to le frog *then* to ashe, I think it just pissed him off more than it scared him"

- "people try to scare us by looking like ashe a lot"

"okay, no, its only been TWO people and one of them IS ASHE."

- charlie: "yeah I was nervous about that encounter considering I looked at my sheet and all I have is a chainsaw and a shotgun in the middle of an active volcano"

- charlie slime has put together a william playlist it's it's my life mission to find it now. I found the ashe playlist I can do this. I need to judge his music taste.

- theyre talking about jason dying in one of the big darkstar battles and everything and grizzly goes "wow it's crazy how dakota was there and saw all of that"

HELP THAT'S SO FUNNY. frankly i would love to see the two hour chess hell session that's so funny to me oh my god. ALSO DAKOTA 18 WHOOOO he can get shot now!!! great!!

literally took so much psychic damage over the quitting the prime defenders talk. head in hands. im so ill over them... oh boy can't wait to see william stay wisp free and enjoy his new lease on life and be a normal uneventful teenager again !! im sure thats what the next few episodes are about!! ^__^;;

but mac he's literally an angel with a shotgun fighting til the wars done!! he wants to live not just survive!!!

prime defenders weeb podcast of all time... were they talking about one piece. thats my guess. one piece & dragon ball. also the more they talk about chaos demons the worse it is!!! fucked up!!! especially with the new knowledge from the oneshot etc! can't wait for someone to get tossed in there!!

all he has is a chainsaw and a shotgun in the middle of an active volcano.... i love u william wisp. god. also PLAYLIST... good luck finding it....

[awkwardtickleetoo]

Lee!George Week Day 7 - Free Day!

AHHHHH DAY 7 IS FINALLY HERE <33333

firstly I just wanna say thank you to everyone for being patient with me and letting me take my sweet ass time with the second half of these prompts <3 I am so grateful that you're all still interested even when I take a month to do a week's worth of fics lmao

secondly I wanna give a huge huge HUGE shoutout to @mushiewrites for putting together this fantastic event!! and just for being so awesome and cool and supportive in this community as a whole. thank you for letting me post these 3 weeks late babes <333

this is the last part of lee!george week!! you can find the prompts here, and if you want to participate make sure to use the tag "mushie's lee!george week" when you post <3

this is based on this concept post that I made (with help from mush) a little bit ago, if you would like some further background on this fic and see what it's all about lmao

lee!george, ler!karl, 3.8k words

enjoy!

--

"What is that?" George asked, furrowing his eyebrows and tilting his head to the side as he pointed to a huge, oddly-shaped chair in the corner of the living room next to the couch. Karl walked into the room behind him, their shoulders brushing as George looked over at him, waiting for his explanation.

"Oh! It's a massage chair," Karl explained, leaning back and forth so their shoulders would continue brushing repeatedly.

"A massage chair…" George repeated, not even thinking about it.

"Mhm! I was having trouble with my back for a while so I saw a chiropractor, and she gave me a couple different options of things to do, and one of them was looking into getting a massage chair if I had the means to do so. And now I have one!" Karl explained enthusiastically.

"Huh… that's pretty epic," George responded simply, making Karl laugh again.

"Do you wanna try it?"

"Uh…" George scrunched up his nose and paused apprehensively. "I'm not sure, I don't really like massages that much."

"Yeah, but it's a little different. It's not someone digging their knuckles into your spine, it's like… it vibrates and shit."

"I'm not a big fan of when stuff 'vibrates and shit' either," George said, putting air quotes around the words he took from Karl. He giggled as Karl rolled his eyes at him, looking at him judgingly.

"Just sit in the stupid chair, you meathead," Karl teased, and George giggled again and walked over to the chair, turning around in front of it and leaning slightly to sit before pausing.

"Hm…" He hummed in confusion, not entirely sure where or how to sit the most effectively.

"Here, sit on the edge here and scoot into the middle, you'll, like, slide down it." George did exactly that, tensing his arms to his sides and sitting down on the edge slowly, clearly a bit hesitant but still curious to see how it worked. He stayed leaning forward, until Karl put a hand on his shoulder and gently guided him to lean back against the chair. "Yeah, good, then you put your calves in between these things," Karl explained, leaning down and tapping the leg dividers with his fingers. "And then you stick your feet in those things."

"You want me to stick my feet in the holes on this contraption?" George asked, in slight disbelief of what was being asked of him. "It's gonna, like, chop my feet off or something!"

"It's not gonna chop anything, you nutjob, you'll be fine. It's just part of the massage," Karl explained, slipping the remote out of the pouch on the side of the armrest. George groaned and rolled his eyes, resting his feet on top of the foot rest next to the holes and curling his toes nervously.

"This feels weird, Karl," He mumbled. Karl didn't look up at him, too busy fussing with different buttons on the remote.

"You'll be fine, you're just being a baby. Just put them in and relax." George groaned again, more dramatically this time, and stuck his feet in the holes like he was told. "Okay, good, now chill out. Do you wanna recline?"

"Of course, idiot. You gotta go horizontal," George said, making a horizontal line in the air with his hands as he nestled into the surprisingly comfortable chair behind him. Karl giggled and nodded, pressing some buttons and starting George's recline. He ended up decently far back, laying at about a 45 degree angle, and he let his head rest back against the pillow when he noticed the new position strained his neck when he tried to keep looking forward. "That's perfect."

"Awesome. What setting do you want? There's the one that just vibrates and one that also, like… there's moving parts in the back of the chair that physically massage into your back, but that kinda hurts the first time you use it so we can save that for after, if you end up wanting it."

"Gotcha." George rolled his shoulders as Karl continued.

"Do you want the low vibration or the high setting?"

"High setting, obviously. If we're going in, let's go all in."

"Good answer!" Karl giggled. "Alright, I'm starting it."

"Okay…" George straightened his back against the chair and waited a few seconds for it to kick on.

He was very, very unpleasantly surprised when it did.

"Ah!" He yelped, feeling the heavy vibrations immediately send a shock up his spine, making him arch away from the back of the chair and push forward again. "God, that scared me."

"Yeah, it's very sudden. C'mon, lean back," Karl coached, motioning for him to return to his laying position. He did so, leaning back and pressing against the chair again, flinching again when his back felt the vibrations, but somehow being able to stay against it this time. He tried to even out his breathing, but for some reason that he couldn't quite place yet, it felt heavy and labored, like his chest was tight. After a few seconds passed, he started to realize what was actually happening.

The vibrations were heavy, rattling his body continuously and mercilessly, settling against every area of his body– the back of his neck, his shoulder blades, down his spine, the backs of his ribs and sides, even down to the dimples on his lower back. The seat was vibrating against his thighs where he sat firmly against it, and there were other cushions on either side of him, sitting directly against his waist and vibrating over his sides, the lower section of his ribs, and right above his hip bones. Even the leg rests moved as well, catching his knees and calves in the process. And to make matters even more unbearable, his feet were stuck inside what felt like two tiny sealed boxes, the sides pressing in against his ankles to keep him still and several rollers spinning and vibrating against his defenseless soles. The hard vibrations were covering his entire body, every spot he could possibly focus on to distract himself being affected worse than the last.

And it tickled.

It really, really, really fucking tickled.

Once he had that realization, he couldn't seem to stop thinking about it. Every spot he could rattle off in his mind was buzzing, literally. He scrunched his toes, tensed his knees, tried to bring his thighs together or pull them away from the seat, but nothing worked. He shifted his hips, pinned his arms to his sides, bit his lip, tried to slow his breathing, but still, nothing. He was in absolute ticklish agony, and the worst part was that Karl hadn't seemed to notice yet, so he had no good excuse to remove himself from the situation without blowing his own cover.

"How's that feel?" Karl asked, smiling expectantly as he slid the remote back into the pouch. "Feels good, right? Really good if your back is tense."

"Yeah!" He agreed, his voice coming out significantly higher pitched than he intended. He cleared his throat before continuing. "Ye-yeah, it's, um, it– it's really good, Karl." His voice wavered as he spoke, but Karl seemed to chalk it up to the vibrations against his back shaking him.

"Dude, I love it. I've fully slept in this thing before. Not on high, obviously, because that would be a lot of motion to sleep through, but on the lowest and, like, softest setting with the massages going and the Bluetooth speakers that you can hook up to music or a show or something, it's just so–" Karl paused when he heard a strange noise from George, glancing over to see his thighs tensed together and one hand covering his ribs as he leaned towards the other side. As soon as he did, however, he flinched again and leaned back to the other side. Karl watched this happen a few more times before he situated himself, sitting very stiff in the middle of the side cushions, arching forward slightly. "Dude, are you okay?"

"Y-yeah–" George began, but he had to stop before he got any further to bite back a giggle, clamping his mouth shut. He tried to lean forward, or push himself out to the end of the chair, but with the angle the chair was reclined at it was nearly impossible to sit up far enough to get any leverage, especially with how he was quickly growing weaker from the constant tickling. He grabbed the sides, trying to pull himself, but his elbows gave out and he fell right back into the chair, a strained noise leaving his mouth as he arched away again, putting his hands on his own thighs and squeezing the material of his shorts. Karl smirked, and suddenly he knew exactly what was going on.

"Ohhhhh, I see why you're uncomfortable," Karl began, and George looked up at him with wide eyes and a slack jaw, trying to figure out whether he'd been caught yet.

He absolutely had been.

"Y-you doho?" He asked, letting his first giggle slip, holding his breath to keep any more from following.

"Yeah! You gotta lean all the way against it for it to work!" Karl explained, pretending he had no idea what he was doing, but the smirk on his face and the way he giggled proved otherwise. Then, just as cruel as his smirk implied, he reached forward and curled his hands around George's sides, pressing him all the way back into the vibrating chair. George gasped, shaking his head, whining and pushing Karl's wrists away. "There we goooo, see! Isn't that so much better?"

"Karl, nohoho, no, thahat– this is–'' George tried to fight back, pushing at Karl's hands, but Karl didn't budge. Instead, Karl just held his sides more firmly, and rattled him against the chair, shaking and bouncing his upper body against the already incessant vibrating sensation. George curled up immediately after Karl steadied him, leaning forward and pinching his elbows into his sides. He tried to pull his legs up, but he was stopped by his calves and feet still being held hostage in their designated parts of the chair. His giggles had already begun, and suddenly they felt impossible to keep at bay, and he started giggling openly, only getting louder and more boisterous as the maddening tickles went on. "Oh, gohohod, Kahahaharl!"

"Aww, what's-a-matter, George? Is the pretty boy too tickly to handle a little massaging?" Karl teased, his hands still resting on George's sides, vibrating his fingers in as well just to make George squeal and scrunch up more, shaking his head wildly.

"Nahahaha, Kaharl!" George pleaded. He once again tried leaning forward and arching his spine, keeping his back as far away from the tickles as he could (even though his hips and legs were still horribly trapped), and Karl decided that just wouldn't do. So, just to be more cruel, he braced himself on the arm of the chair and hopped up onto George's lap, letting his knees rest on either side of George's thighs and settling himself right on top of his legs. George nearly screamed, immediately followed by an intense blush and him curling in on himself further.

"Yeah, you've got nowhere to run off to now, do you, kitten?" Karl teased, putting one hand on George's chest and pushing him back into the chair.

"KAHARL–" George yelped, biting back more laughter as he tried desperately to push against Karl's hand, but he got nowhere. Then, even though it was entirely unnecessary, Karl placed his other hand on his chest and pushed as well, just to make him feel even more helpless, "KARL, PLEHEHEASE–"

"Please, what?" He asked sarcastically, sliding his hands down George's chest and slipping his fingers under George's arms. The elder tensed immediately, groaning and clamping his arms down to his sides, looking up at Karl with pleading eyes and a wide smile. "Please help even out the tickles by giving some of my own? George, that is just such a good idea, you read my mind!" Karl dug his fingers into George's underarms, making him curl up his shoulders and shake his head wildly. His elbows bent as well, his hands clenched into fists, and all he could think to do was twist his wrists, fidget his fingers, and shake his clenched hands around to get his nerves out. Karl giggled at this, always a fan of when George did that, finding the reaction (that he, Sapnap, and Dream refer to as his "tickle hands") absolutely adorable and endearing.

"Nohohoho, Kahaharl!" George whined, twisting and turning whichever way he could, ending up leaning to the left with his forehead against Karl's upper arm. Karl giggled, sliding out of his armpits and pushing his shoulders to sit him straight back again, making George squeeze his eyes shut and shake his head again. "Whyhyhyhy?!"

"I never told you to move, dummy! Stay where you are."

"I cahahahan't!"

"Well, sucks for you then," Karl finished, bracing his hands on George's thighs as he adjusted himself. This motion only earned him a squeak and a violent flinch, George's legs clearly trying to buck up away from the vibrations underneath them, and Karl only giggled and reached behind him to squeeze at George's knees. George screamed out in laughter, throwing his head back against the chair and squirming wildly, and Karl could feel his knees trying so, so hard to kick or push or move in any way to escape Karl's fingers, to entirely no avail.

He was trapped, and he was trapped well.

"Oh gohohohod, Kahahaharl, pleheHEASE–" He yelled, his laughter increasing in volume at the end when Karl grabbed his thighs again, squeezing them a few times about mid-way up as he actually did adjust himself. He stood up, his legs on either side of George's with his feet planted on the floor, still keeping his body firmly in place but giving himself more room to move now. George looked up, giggling even more nervously when he noticed Karl was now towering over him. "Wh-whahaha– whahahat ahare you doihihihing?"

"Getting better leverage? Duh, stupid," Karl bit with a giggle, quickly ruffling George's hair and then grabbing his sides when he reached up to fix it.

"KARL!" George yelped, grabbing Karl's wrists before falling into more frantic laughter. Karl laughed at him again, squeezing his sides once. "Ihihihit's nohot funnyhyhy!"

"It's so funny, I've said this to you so many times. You get so jumpy when you get tickled, it's the cutest thing ever," Karl said, scrunching up his nose in the middle and making George scrunch his as well, shaking his head.

"Nohohoho!" George protested, squeezing Karl's wrists before sliding his hands off, clenching them into fists and softly resting his fists on Karl's arms.

"Oh, god, and your poor thighs are against the vibrations too, and on the backs too! Wow, Georgie boy, this must be hell for you, you poor thing."

"Shuhuhut uhuhup!"

"Hm… okay! I'll use my mouth somewhere else then," Karl said, suddenly leaning down and pushing the front of George's t-shirt up so he would understand what was happening before getting to make the inappropriate joke that he knew George was thinking of. George gasped, sucking in his tummy and pressing back into the chair, just to flinch back down and keep switching between the two. Karl was right, his tummy really was jumpy– as were his legs and arms, and his heart in his chest and the butterflies in his stomach.

"NO! Kahahaharl, nohoho!" He protested, placing one hand on the back of Karl's head and holding the other one out in the air next to him, unsure what to do with it, fingers tense and twitching as he shook his hand out to try to expel some of his trapped energy. "Kahaharl, plehehease don't, plehease dohohon't, you cahahahan't!"

"I mean, I can. And I'm gonna. If I raspberry your tummy it'll make the vibrations even on both sides of you! Right, my kitten?" Karl teased, giggling when he felt George's legs twitch behind him with the urge to get free. George shook his head wildly, keeping his eyes up so he wouldn't make eye contact with Karl.

"I hahahahate thihihis," George whined, clearly lying, as he made no move to push Karl away even before he began, and made no move to truly sit back up even before he lost a majority of his strength, considering he technically did have free reign to do so. In fact, Karl could've sworn he felt George even pull his head closer when he started getting impatient and antsy.

"Yeah, yeah, you hate this, you hate me, I'm so cruel and mean and horrible to you, yada yada. We've heard it all before, handsome, we know it's not true. Now shut your mouth and laugh more," Karl teased, ignoring George's gasp and attempts to stutter out a response and pushing forward instead, pressing his lips right next to George's belly button and blowing the biggest raspberry he could manage.

"NAHA–!" George squealed, tensing his stomach and tangling his fingers in Karl's hair. He didn't pull, making no indication that he even cared if Karl would stop or not, but Karl knew he must've been exhausted due to the constant tickling sensation he was already suffering through because of the massage chair. He blew another raspberry, this time closer to the front of his ribcage, making him jerk to the side and then jerk back when he hit the vibrating cushion instead. "Plehehehease!" George pleaded, and he squeezed his hand on Karl's head a little tighter, and Karl decided to cut him some slack.

"Okay, okay, I'm done. Relax, you baby." Karl said as he pulled back, standing up straight and crossing his arms, looking down at George with a fond smile as he continued laughing hysterically, his squirming starting up again when he had more room to move.

"Kaharl, plehehehease," George pleaded, curling his arms in again and covering his face with his hands.

"I don't know what you mean," Karl replied, his tone betraying him almost immediately.

"Kahahaharl!" George whined, dropping his hands down to the chair and trying to push himself up one final time, but it was still no use. He dropped down again, grabbing his shorts and arching his back again, unsure of what else to do with himself.

"Oh my god, you're so overdramatic, it cannot be that bad."

"Thehehehen yohou tryhyhy!" George fought back, reaching over to grab the remote to turn the chair off himself, but he squeaked and yanked his arm back when he was cut off by Karl harshly poking his ribs and then grabbing the remote first so George couldn't get it. "Nohoho!"

"Too slow!"

"Kaharl, plehehease, tuhurn it ohohohoff!"

"Hmmmm…" Karl pretended to think, looking up at the ceiling and tapping his cheek, drawing his mouth to one side before clicking his tongue a few times.

"Plehehehease, I cahahahan't tahahake ihit anymohohore!" George pleaded, and Karl knew he was telling the truth. He could tell George was completely tickled out, so he giggled softly and pressed a few buttons, stopping the movement of the chair completely.

"Ugh, fine. If I have to," Karl rolled his eyes softly as the chair went still, chuckling at George's relieved whimper. "Even though I'd love to leave you stuck there forever because you're just that cute, I think you've suffered enough for one day."

"Thahank yohou," George agreed, letting his eyes slip closed as he caught his breath, his smile still plastered to his face and residual giggles still falling from his lips. He recovered relatively quickly, as the tickling wasn't intense and difficult so much as it was resilient and tiresome, and he let out another sigh about a minute later when he felt like he was fully present again. "That was so evil."

"To be fair, I had no idea it would tickle you that much, to be 100% clear," Karl defended, placing the remote back in the side pouch and climbing onto the chair to sit on the arm, putting his feet next to George's thigh and shoving his toes underneath him, making them both laugh at the strange action. "Like I genuinely didn't know it would, I know it tickles a little, because I've used it before and it does give you a little– a little somethin'-somethin', y'know? But it's never been unbearable, usually it just feels nice," Karl explained, making George him in agreement. George glanced up at Karl, before leaning over and pressing his temple against Karl's knee. Karl smiled, reaching down to play with George's hair as he sighed again, softer this time. He continued speaking. "But I guess since you weren't anticipating it, and you've never used it before, it was just worse. Maybe I've just gotten used to it?"

"Mm, maybe. That is quite possible," George agreed, his voice already sounding sleepy.

"Or maybe you're just really ticklish."

"That's– what!?" George complained, whipping his head up to look at Karl and ending up with Karl's hand on the top of his head. Karl chuckled and gently tilted his head back down, carding his hand through his hair again and letting him sulk against his shin. "That's not true."

"No, it's not. Well, it is, you are really, really, really ticklish," Karl said, chuckling and scratching George's scalp lightly when he whined and pushed against his leg more. "But I'm just teasing about that being the reason, I know it's not."

"Good. You'd better," George mumbled, pushing away from Karl's leg and tugging on one of his ankles. "Come down more."

"Like– down with you?"

"Mhm."

"Oh!" Karl smiled, pushing himself down to sit on top of George, perching himself on his lap and crossing his ankles over the arm of the chair. George leaned back against the chair, now pulling Karl's arm so he stayed against his chest. "S'this good?"

"Mhm," George confirmed with a smile, closing his eyes again. The room was silent for a few seconds, before George continued quietly. "Do you– do you think you could try the actual massage part? Without the stupid vibrating part."

"Yeah! Of course, dollface," Karl said, kissing his cheek softly when he gave him a confused look. Karl turned the back massage section on low, letting George feel it out before flicking it to the second level and leaving it there, smiling as he immediately relaxed into it.

They stayed like that for about 5 minutes, until George figured the massage had run its course and had Karl turn it off. Everything seemed peaceful, George finally seemed relaxed, and Karl got to witness George being the cutest person on the planet (in his opinion), and they figured they'd just be able to sit back and cuddle up together while watching something or talking aimlessly.

Until Sapnap came back downstairs from taking a shower, and asked what they'd gotten up to while he was gone. Karl, obviously, was thrilled to explain, having to slap a hand over George's mouth to muffle his screaming and protesting while he did so, and Sapnap was very interested in the information he'd just received.

Needless to say, the room did not stay quiet for long.

[tonydaddingham]

sideburn theory strikes again

idk if its just that i have been fully driven around the bend by this show or is this is Big Brain special, but if all fails this is the lore of a crossover you might not have known you wanted.

so i posted way back in the bygone era of pre-s2 that i felt that there was something potentially behind the different sideburn lengths in the trailer and first promos, and my darling @theeminentlyimpractical added into this, plus the added spot of crowley's sunglasses changing. now this appears to have been debunked by further s2 content (and indeed s2 in its entirety), because there didn't appear to be rhyme nor reason to the sideburns, but there was to the sunglasses. so we kinda left it alone (although people keep rb'ing the original theory, frankly god knows why).

now we kinda came up with some explanation for this, which ive summarised in this ask earlier, but then. then. we saw this brilliant observation by @rebeccasteventaylor, and thought - well, fuck it, let's take another look.

note: reference screenshots of nearly every crowley scene, per episode, at end of post.

so main observations so far:

crowley seems to exclusively wear the silver sunglasses in ep1 and ep2

then switches to the new grey sunglasses from ep3 onwards

he has a mix of long and short sideburns ep1 to ep4, and switches sideburn lengths in those eps between scenes

then seems to exclusively have long sideburns in the 'second half'* ep5, and in ep6.

then i have the following thoughts from both seasons:

we know that crowley is a singular demon in that he has an imagination

we know that he is pretty powerful, including the ability to stop and hold time

there are indeed plenty of doctor who references which - absolutely, may be an innocent homage to david tennant - but seem so pointed in s2 that it's almost unnerving

two quotes! first: "if any harm comes to aziraphale because of this, i will... oh, it doesn't matter, it's too late for that now, isn't it?... its always too late."

second: "i know... looking at/working out where the furniture isn't..."

the crow road by Iain Banks is introduced at the very end of s2, being read by muriel, and has very prominent features on screen when metatron asks them about it. crow road plot involves the main character piecing together notes/sketches left by their late uncle. (by the by, very purposeful feature in s2 that aziraphale keeps multiple diaries, and can sketch real good - including specifically a picture of gabriel)

now, before i start parsing out the theory (though tbh, by this point, i imagine you can see where im going with this), i will add that as i said in the above linked ask, im fully on board with the sideburn thing being bc of AP/confines of filming in COVID, and so it may just be a detail that had to slide or was missed. but that isn't as fun as putting on the tinfoil hat.

the main thing for me is that the long sideburns seem to consistently appear on screen after aziraphale and crowley talk in justine's restaurant in ep5*. once crowley goes over to the bookshop to confront gabriel, the long sideburns seem to remain. this is also where crowley appears to be at his angriest which, tbh, is kind of at odds with how he seemed to speak about and treat gabriel in ep3 and ep4.

let's start with ep3 (ill come back to ep1 and ep2*). in the vavoom scene, crowley almost seems quite chummy towards gabriel, perhaps slightly condescending, but warmer than he is after shax arrives. now, shax turning up to remind crowley of the stakes involved (ie threat to aziraphale) is completely trackable against how crowley then speaks to gabriel afterwards. but it is this quote that has baffled me slightly:

"if any harm comes to aziraphale because of this, i will... oh, it doesn't matter, it's too late for that now... its always too late."

and the reason it baffles me is because... well, i don't really get what crowley is talking about? he's rescued aziraphale on plenty of occasions, and seems to always be in the nick of time (or stopping it, if you consider 1793), and aziraphale has previously rescued crowley back with impeccable timing.

aziraphale hasn't actually come to much harm in any of the story we've seen so far; the only time crowley wasn't on time was with the bookshop fire, and whilst that was resolved, it would match up with what crowley's saying about being too late... but 'always too late'? ie, more than once? seems like there's been a pattern where crowley is too late.

the other thought i had on this is that crowley says "too late" in reference to saving morag in the same episode (but in the resurrectionist minisode within) but that was on aziraphale himself for dithering - why would crowley talk about it? so it seems to me that there are other instances where crowley himself has been too late to save aziraphale. the only time i really think this happens, where aziraphale ends up in danger, is the Domestic at the end of ep6 when crowley is too late to tell aziraphale how he feels - which probably would have influenced his decision to stay and not walk willingly into the clutches of the metatron... but in the s2 narrative, that hasn't happened yet.

furthermore, @theeminentlyimpractical brought up this little detail up from the book:

which doesn't necessarily mean anything in this theory's context, that crowley has one of his watch's clocks programmed to hell's timezone, but appears to be a detail specifically related to crowley nonetheless; futile fight, helplessness, the concept of always being Too Late.

the last thing however to mention about ep3 is that there appears to be a very clear before and after where the sideburns are concerned. where muriel turns up, and crowley and aziraphale talk in the back-back room, crowley is sporting shorter sideburns. but after aziraphale leaves, crowley comes down from upstairs carrying books, and has longer sideburns. i don't necessarily have any explanation for this, but do observe that it seems quite deliberate for the episode that he has the longer ones once aziraphale leaves, and continuing into ep4 when aziraphale comes back from edinburgh.

ep5 however, crowley arrives on whickber street, and is back with ye old short sideburns again. the only time this changes in the beginning half(ish)* is when he and aziraphale visit Arnold's. once again, don't really have any theoretical explanation for this, but one thing i will say is that when crowley and aziraphale approach the archway/alley that goes to Arnold's (just after "can i watch?"), they're in step with each other... but when aziraphale gets to the window, he's alone for a good few seconds and crowley doesn't appear - he might be out of shot, but then does appear just as aziraphale enters the shop... just an odd amount of time to have not followed aziraphale to the window.

in any case, crowley then follows around, gets waylaid and epiphany-slapped by nina, gets somewhat pissed in justine's, and then heads over to the bookshop. where he next appears upstairs, and suddenly sporting long sideburns again. it then seems somewhat pointed that this is where he really lays in to gabriel - now, contributory factors here are he's just been hit with the realisation that he loves aziraphale and aziraphale loves him, and he's probably about five sheets to the wind.

but it's particularly venomous and angry which - yeah, tracks - but i wonder if this is in response to something more? that crowley has more to be angry at gabriel over, more to be resentful of, than just that gabriel's presence in the bookshop could bring harm to aziraphale, and gabriel's involvement in the botched execution?

add to this, the line that we're all losing our heads over?

"i know... looking at/working out where the furniture isn't..." (subtitles conflict on amazon re: the first bit vs what im personally hearing, but neil has confirmed it's at least 'where the furniture isn't.')

now this all relates in the conversation back to gabriel's analogy of his missing memory feeling like a house with missing furniture, and trying to work out what in fact is missing. many have speculated that crowley might have gone through the same predicament of forcibly losing his memory (and s2 certainly does set it up like that), but i do wonder if it in fact twists that crowley is actually investigating the missing furniture, piecing together his own clues?

his tone being resigned and bitchy, even mocking, could well just be him laying on gabriel again, or indeed he could be empathising because he too has lost his memories, or because he's in the same boat and trying to piece things together... just, not in the same way?

so let's come back to what im actually getting at here; does crowley expand on his time-stopping powers, and does he essentially step back into his own timeline? and has to piece it together à la crow road?

was there an alternative timeline that still resulted in aziraphale going to heaven, but under different circumstances, and crowley comes back to change it to no avail, and that's where we leave s2? or, in this aborted (?) timeline, does aziraphale get got by hell, or gets taken out of the BOL (and falls?), crowley is trying to work out how/why, tracks it back through to the events we see in s2, ends up helping to hide gabriel (eg. he comes back after the So Did I argument), but then that leads down the path of losing aziraphale to heaven anyway, just in a different way? "it's always too late"?

now, don't let it be said that i won't poke holes in my own theory, because this is absolutely crazy and relatively baseless... and is so easily explained as just being One Of Those Filming Things (i simply felt it was slightly remiss to not mention these thoughts floating in my noggin).

the main issue of course is that *ep1 and ep2 are literally a mess where this theory is concerned. there are some short/long sideburn differences that can't be explained away, because the scenes literally follow in succession to each other - eg. ep1 goes from leaving the coffee shop (short), to the gabriel reveal (long), to So Did I (short again). another eg. ep2 goes from leaving the pub (long), to the walk across the road (short), to the job segue (long again). i could try to explain this with "oh crowley stopped time and switched", but that would probably be a bit of a cop out, however possible it might technically be within the narrative.

i don't even really know where to leave this off, but im still just of the mind that for a show where attention to detail is Everything (take the neil ask about the records, for example; he immediately spotted that the holes weren't right for jukebox compatibility, but they had to accept it as a good regardless), this feels like a pretty Big Goof?

alternatively yes, it might be AP whereupon david was going into another job fairly shortly after reshoot work was needed, or there were COVID related filming issues, but a) seems like a lot of reshoot work/pickups, and b) couldnt they have just trimmed the 'burns/be able to fake the length? idk but my brain is scrambled and im so confused.

screenshots!

S/L (red) - short/long sideburns, S/G (grey) - silver/grey sunglasses

episode one:

episode two:

episode three:

episode four:

episode five:

episode six:

[sovereign-skyy]

So was the cypher just a 22 shift cypher with + at the end of the alphabet or did you do something special beyond that? Bc while I know what the correct translation should be I can't quite put together why an answer with just the 22-shift would be close if the decoder is just using the regular alphabet but completely off when using a 27 letter alphabet of A through +. I know the paragraph before is supposed to have all the clues but there's definitely something I am missing and I gotta know what. Sorry to just pop up randomly and ask you this but I saw Amity reblog another question about it and just like zeroed on your blog in bc cryptography and flirting is so fucking cool and your rules do say to send you an ask.

First of all, don't apologise for popping up out of nowhere I love this! I have it in my bio for a reason lol

For anyone who didn't see the cipher in question (which I expect to be almost everyone who sees this) here's the link to @k1nky-r0b0t-g1rl's post (I'll also be quoting the relevant stuff but if you wanna try to kinda still solve it for yourself start there, I'll be explaining it in detail here):

I'll make this a more comprehensive explanation for anyone who wants it so it's probably gonna contain quite some stuff you already know, if you want to skip it just scroll until you see 'NOW FOR THE GOOD STUFF' in big text!

SO

Here we have the original message:

E sxjp pk ejopxhh x oqynkqpeja ejpk ukqn ouopaio pdxp ixgao ukq osepzd ejpk dknju ik+a sdajaran E oxu "Kd Xiepu gjkso sxuu ikna xykqp pdxp," ok pdxp E zxj ixga ukq atlhxej atpnaiahu zkilhezxpa+ pklezo sdeha ukq'na oq++ajhu qjyaxnxyhu dknju xj+ pnuejc +aolxnxpahu pk de+a ep.

And this is the hint I gave:

There's three important parts to this so I'll go through them in order

Firstly, the hint is about Julius Caesar, hinting at the fact that the later text is encoded by a Caesar cipher. This is a cryptographic method where you move all the letters forward a certain amount (called the shift) of letters in the alphabet. So a caesar cipher with a right shift of 1 shifts all the letters one space forward, eg. A -> B, X -> Y. Generally the right shift is the default so I left it at that. A better hint would have also incorporated the right part but eh I'm not perfect.

Secondly, I talk about 23 people stabbing him, which indicates a shift of 23, giving us the following conversion table:

where the top row is the original letters and the bottom is the shifted letter values. If we left it at this and tried to decode the message we'd get:

H vams sn hmrsakk a rtbqntshmd hmsn xntq rxrsdlr sgas lajdr xnt rvhscg hmsn gnqmx ln+d vgdmdudq H rax "Ng Alhsx jmnvr vaxx lnqd abnts sgas," rn sgas H cam lajd xnt dwokahm dwsqdldkx cnlokhcasd+ snohcr vghkd xnt'qd rt++dmkx tmbdaqabkx gnqmx am+ sqxhmf +droaqasdkx sn gh+d hs.

Which is very much not correct. Now, we can cheat a little and change this to a 22-shift cipher (which is not correct) and get the following:

I wbnt to instbll b sucroutine into your systems thbt mbkes you switdh into horny mo+e whenever I sby "Oh Bmity knows wbyy more bcout thbt," so thbt I dbn mbke you explbin extremely domplidbte+ topids while you're su++enly uncebrbcly horny bn+ trying +espbrbtely to hi+e it.

Then we see something comprehensible, but not quite correct: there's some random B's, C's and D's in there and still some plusses in the middle of words. Regardless, you can make out from this wrong result what the message was supposed to be (an oversight on my part, and something I will take into account if/when I do it again)

And now comes the spicy part!

Thirdly, I say "a little (+) at the end" which (as you correctly identified in your ask) refers to the fact that I didn't use the default 26-letter alphabet, but instead used a slightly modified 27-letter alphabet with a + at the end, so we'd have the following letter order (I'll be referring to this as alphabet+ for brevity)

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ+

If we try to decode the message as a 23-rightshift caesar cipher with alphabet+, we get the following conversion table and message:

I want to install a subroutine into your systems that makes you switch into horny mode whenever I say "Oh Amity knows wayy more about that," so that I can make you explain extremely complicated topics while you're suddenly unbearably horny and trying desparately to hide it.

Which is finally correct! Yay, we have the original message!

NOW FOR THE GOOD STUFF

But now we finally get to your question: why does the regular 22-shift almost work if it's totally wrong for alphabet+?

For that, we can consider the equivalent left-shift operations of our right-shift decodings:

For any standard alphabet caesar cipher, the 26-shift (left or right) operation is the same as the unencoded version (because A + 26 spaces is once again A), which means that we can also express our right-shift operations as a left-shift operation of shift 26 - R where R is the shift of our right-shift (if this doesn't make sense to anyone I'm happy to try to expand on it btw).

For the alphabet cipher, that means a 23 right-shift is equivalent to a 3 left-shift, and a 22 right-shift is equivalent to a 4 left-shift.

However, for alphabet+, it doesn't take 26 shifts to get back to normal, but 27 (since there's 27 characters in alphabet+). This means that a 23 right-shift alphabet+ operation is equivalent to a 4 left-shift and NOT a 3 left-shift.

Now, since they're not the same set of characters, an alphabet 4 left-shift is not the same as an alphabet+ 4 left-shift. However, it's good to take into account that the solution in alphabet+ is also very similar to our almost-solution in the regular alphabet.

If you'll look at Table 1 and 2 again, you'll see that while A, B and C translate to X, Y and Z for both 23 right-shifts, the + in the middle for alphabet+ messes everything up and leaves us with an icky leftover left-shift of 1 (which is close, but still incomprehensible to humans since it's such a big portion of letters)

However, if we create a conversion table for the 22 right-shift of the alphabet we get the following:

If we compare this to Table 2, we see that A, B, C & D are not the same for both. However, from E on, these two are EXACTLY the same. The part left of the + just has a right-shift of 1 (which is symmetrical to the left-shift of 1 we saw in Table 1).

So, in conclusion: because of the difference in amount of characters, both the 22 and 23 right-shift alphabet decodings are not EXACTLY the same as the 23 right-shift alphabet+ decoding. However, due to the similarity of the lower 4 left-shift, the 22 has more correct characters and is therefore more comprehensible.

I hope that helps a little and I didn't make it more confusing lmao, this is longer (and also took longer) than I thought it would be but it was fun to write, so thanks for asking! If anything is still unclear feel free to reblog with a question or send me an ask (that counts for anyone reading this btw)! Also, since you said you're a fan of flirting + cryptography, how about I unleash the next cipher on you? ;)

[mornyavie]

https://www.tumblr.com/unsolids-your-snake/731620210662047744

I just saw this post yesterday, are the Amish actually considered a cult?? From what I’ve seen and read about, they’re a pretty chill group, do they actually punish people who seek to leave?

I'll be real, I am deeply unqualified to talk about this; I encourage you to do your own research. I only commented on that post because it seemed like people didn't realize that "shunning" has a particular meaning in those spaces - like, yes at the surface I can see why people thought it was funny, but in context "shunning" isn't just your friends being a bit mad at you. It's an institutional punishment.

Questions like "what is a cult" are probably above my paygrade, but I feel comfortable answering "are they chill" with "no."

Many public-facing aspects would love for you to think that they're chill, and the chillness definitively also depends on the specific group you're talking about.

(Many people just say "Amish" and call it done, but the Amish are only one of a number of "avoid modern tech" groups, and they all have splinter subgroups with various differences; Mennonites are the other major branch of Anabaptists that do this.)

Ok I really. Don't want to try to get into this whole thing. there's probably a book you can read or something. But I don't want to leave you with absolutely nothing, so here's an Amish-authored explanation of shunning that I found:

link here

This is from a website used to sell Amish-made goods, so I think we can be pretty confident that this is attempting to present Amish culture in the best light possible. Here's some quotes:

"Because of this, being shunned can take a massive toll on a person. It’s difficult for someone to survive without the support they’ve grown accustomed to, and shunning can also make it nearly impossible for a person to earn a living." "This is what makes shunning so effective in keeping the community together and ensuring everyone sticks to the agreed-upon community rules." "The Amish practice shunning out of concern for a person. By shunning someone, they hope to get someone to see errors in their behavior, change it and return to the community." "Sins like fornication, adultery, stealing, and lying are all offenses worthy of shunning. This is to discourage other members of the community from committing the same sin."

So, even when presented in an article specifically designed to make this sound like a nice and reasonable thing, "shunning" is explicitly endangering a person by isolating them and cutting off their income, in order to (1) force them to admit fault and return to following the rules (2) make an example of them to scare other people into sticking to the rules.

This is high-control behavior, to put it mildly.

And that's even without getting into the actual specifics of what the rules are. Remember that these are, fundamentally, traditional Christian organizations. Most of them didn't suddenly become cool about women's rights and gay people. Divorce is one of the reasons that article lists for shunning.

Ok I'm sure I already put my foot in it somewhere and I'm really not an expert here. If you have specific research questions that you stumble on you can come back and ask and I'll see if I can help.

[greatwyrmgold]

I love many serial stories, but I'm developing a distaste for serial storytelling.

If you follow me, you've probably figured out that I like both reading and writing media analysis, whether it's essays about the characterization of a web serial's supporting cast or discussing the themes of Shonen Jump manga.

It's pretty easy to read and analyze media that is "complete," a word which here means "the author has written the conclusion". The conclusion is an important part of any story! It's the part where everything built up in the early parts of the story is brought together and assembled into its final form. Every setup has either been paid off or revealed to be a red herring. The puzzle is complete, we can see the picture, we can confidently interpret its meaning.

Analyzing serial media is trickier. You don't have all the pieces; you have to look at what's available, guess what might be missing, and interpret the meaning there might be in the end. This has some consequences.

Sometimes, stuff that you assumed would be explained later isn't. I remember a post I made after Chainsaw Man chapter 137 (which I can't find because Tumblr's search function is terrible) that speculated on why all those people would be mindlessly attacking Denji. It's weird! This isn't the sort of thing that just happens in Chainsaw Man, not without some devil or whatever doing something weird. Controlling people, or making puppets, or at least putting a bounty on Denji's head.

I assumed there would be some kind of explanation in later chapters. And I waited, and kept reading. Months later, I realized that there never really was an explanation. In chapter 138, Yoshida mentioned that it's natural for people to attack Chainsaw Man when they know his identity, and that was it.

Sometimes, stuff that you assume indicates a pattern later isn't. Back in My Hero Academia's sports festival arc, a bunch of spectators flip out when Bakugo beats up Ochaco, and Aizawa goes on a rant about how ridiculous their reaction is. They see a cute girl in a tournament arc and assume she's just a weakling who's being victimized by the big strong bully, and Aizawa won't stand for that. Sure, Bakugo beat her, but only because he recognized her as a threat. To quote Red Sarcasticproductions (2019):

My Hero Academia takes no prisoners when it comes to trope subversion. Man, I hope it stays good.

Foreshadowing is a literary device—

Anyways, it's 2024 and Ochaco has mostly been sidelined. Some time during season three, she and Iida were sidelined in favor of Izuku's new guy friends, Todoroki and Bakugo. Ochaco's only significant contribution in the climactic arc is her catfight with depraved bisexual Toga Himiko, which is its own can of worms.

Luckily, Kohei Horikoshi introduced a bunch of new lady characters with Quirks that can keep pace with the series's power creep. Unfortunately, pretty much all of them are killed, crippled, or otherwise sidelined after getting one cool moment. To be clear, new male characters are also introduced in this time, and while some get killed shortly after their introduction, they don't consistently fall into the same introduction—>action scene—>adios pattern as the women, and that pattern isn't the only pattern which makes the female characters look worse.

My Hero Academia went from being a series notable for vocally supporting its female characters, to a series notable for its mediocre treatment thereof.

And then there's Ward, which isn't a manga at all, despite what some people will claim. (It doesn't even have pictures!) In its last arc, there was some discourse which is difficult to describe without spoiling stuff, so...

There was this plan to solve The Problem. The audience saw a detailed explanation of, and spends chapters watching characters discuss the ramifications of the plan. Vibes in the community are rancid; the superheroes in that story are kinda allegories for people with PTSD and stuff, and the story thus far has drawn a pretty clear connection between "heroic sacrifices" and suicidal tendencies, and the plan seems kinda like a mass "heroic sacrifice"...

Well, it turns out that there was an important detail of the plan which the characters were keeping from the audience. I have strong opinions about why hiding that detail was a bad idea, but it was made so much worse by the serial nature of the story. If Ward was published as one 15-pound book, the time between finding out about the plan and finding out about the twist would be measured in days, if not hours.

But those chapters came out two a week, over the course of months, leaving us fans plenty of time to stew over the implications of that partial puzzle. People who read Ward later don't always like the ending, but they don't dislike it anywhere near as much as people like me who read it chapter by chapter.

And if you wanted another manga example instead of web serials, basically the same thing is going on with Aqua and Ruby's relationship in Oshi no Ko. Unless that's more like Chainsaw Man's "there is no explanation" or MHA's "you only THOUGHT we were handling this well"—it's impossible to say what's going on for certain, and that sucks!

I don't want to say that serial stories punish you for trying to understand them before they're finished; that kind of speculation can be rewarding. (And of course, some stories could not exist without serial publication.) But it can also suck.

It sucks when an explanation you're waiting for never comes. It sucks when a story you thought was good at heart slowly loses its credibility. It sucks when a pacing decision turns an okay writing decision into weeks of agonizing confusion.

[dearweirdme]

“The GCF was not for Jimin’s birthday, don’t know where you got that from, the Tokyo trip wasn’t even for Jimin’s birthday probably. Jimin himself complained about Jk not buying birthday gifts.”

I never said anything about the Tokyo trip being a birthday present. If Beyond The Story explained anything, is that they agreed to go on this trip together as an escape from the hell that was their life at that time. JK posted a picture of Jimin sleeping on his birthday with the caption "it's not over yet" as in he probably had more in store for Jimin's birthday. A couple of weeks later they went on that trip and then when they came back and told us about it, Jimin mentioned how JK took care of everything, from buying the tickets to booking the hotel rooms, to even paying for everything during their stay (and later complaining about how much money he spent because of Jimin's shopping 😭 Very domestic if you ask me)

As for the birthday gifts, Jimin did complain about JK being bad at buying gifts. But in Festa 2017, the members all jokingly interrogated him on why he only bought Jimin a birthday gift on his last birthday (2016, since 2017 Festa was filmed before Jimin's 2017 birthday) Namjoon said, and I quote, “When it was my birthday last year, we didn't have a culture of getting each other birthday presents (…) So I just wondered, because we had Suga hyung, Taehyung, Jin hyung, and Hoseok's birthdays too. But why did he he only give a birthday present to Jimin?" and Jin continued "I saw him giving Jimin a gift so I thought ‘Jungkook started taking care of others!’ but after that he never did it again!” and he added “After I saw him giving Jimin a present I even went to him and told him ‘I want this, Jungkook. I wish you would get me this for my birthday present’ while I was doing something for him. Jungkook said ‘Alright’ and on December 4th he just said ‘Hey, happy birthday!’” — He didn't even try to explain himself, he just listened to them complain about how he exclusively got Jimin a gift and then them switching up and defending him from allegations and saying he's generous and how birthday presents don't matter anyway. So Jimin said “Do we give him time for an explanation?” and gave him the maknae privilege to talk without a time limit as they've been doing initially with all members, but JK only had one thing to say “I will choose your presents more carefully and...” but they cut him off to tell him it's okay and that they don't really want/need gifts especially because he's the maknae, etc. But it's funny how he still never did it again as far as we know.

Hi again anon!

So no reply to the rest of my answer?

Your words ‘or how he made a whole GCF for him to celebrate his birthday’.

Jk’s post on Jimin’s birthday to me just looks like it’s referring to the day in question not being over yet. Jimins birthday is October 13th, the GCF was posted November 8th.. how is that connected to Jimin’s birthday, except for Jkkrs assumptions on that?

From the book it became clear that a Bighit employee living in Japan helped them plan the trip. Jk himself said he had no money while shopping. But feel free to send me when they did talk about Jk paying for everything.

Also.. super romantic…

Your birthday gift analysis only shows how Jk is not good at buying birthday gifts for members, including for Jimin.. because only one instance isn’t really proof of anything now is it?

[twenty-words-or-less]

Top 5 Worst Films of 2022

Okay, so. Here we go. At the end of January... my personal summary of the year. This shit is surprisingly difficult. A Best list will also be done, but I thought I'd start with the negative first so as to not end the year on a sour note.

I would like to emphasise that these are my opinions, and if you disagree... fight me in the inbox. Okay. Here we go. And yeah, it's going to be long.

5. The Invitation

Despite the beautiful costumes and decent performances, this nominally January horror fell flat with its mundanity, half-arsed references to Dracula (of course), and compensation for the 15 rating. Sophie Corneliusson is having a whale of a time, though.

4. Firestarter

Not terrible, but not good, either. Some lines felt they were written by a completely different person, and a great deal of promise was shat on and binned. Left feeling nothing. No wonder it bombed.

3. Crimes of the Future

A VERY controversial choice, I know, but I was really looking forward to this one, and the final product was a letdown. The worldbuilding is really well-developed and Kristen Stewart is pretty good, but unfortunately, I couldn't get past the wanky dialogue and the apparent lack of plot (and point) until the end. Disappointing.

2. Fruits Basket: Prelude

Maybe it's because I watched it drunk but I didn't understand what the fuck was going on at any given time. Completely inaccessible for those who hadn't seen the TV show. Completely frustrating watch. Again, really pretty to look at.

Honourable Mentions

Morbius: I don't think I need to elaborate on this. Also I will glue Lego to the feet of anyone who quotes any meme from this film. And I do mean anyone.

The Next 365 Days (Kolejne 365 dni): I want to sit down with the script translator and whoever organised the soundtrack and ask them "why?". Just "why?". They can answer in Polish, I'll just Google Translate their answers like they Google Translated the script and then play an on-the-nose song as I do so.

The 355: Eh.

Luckiest Girl Alive: Terrible characters, terrible handling of themes. Hope someone hired a chiropractor for Mila Kunis - she must have been in agony after carrying this film.

And now, the worst thing I saw this year...

1. Jurassic World: Dominion

Films are meant to be one cohesive project wherein scenes are joined together to build a story. A film should be as long as the story naturally goes. If there are any legacy characters, they should be used to enhance a story, and not be a crutch for it. The existence of a sequel should be justified; a second sequel should definitely need more explanation as to its existence. In a second sequel, existing characters should be actual characters and not just stock photos of tropes. A filmmaker whose career spans twenty years should have this drilled into his head. Dominion is a two and a half hour display of this not being the case at all. Trevorrow, put the cameras down, take your money, and slip away into the night before you can embarrass yourself any further. You're done, and you've taken the franchise with you.

Thanks for reading! Best Of post coming soon.

~ Mikey

[mntalbrakdown]

good 4 u

Sebastian Stan x actress! reader

Based on 'Good 4 U - Olivia Rodrigo'

Mentions of: cheating, angst, manipulation

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7

masterlist!

It's been six months since I cheated on you, I am so sorry y/n. But I am really happy you moved on, would you like to meet up? You read aloud what Sebastian had just sent you, you couldn't believe it. But you decided to do it, to benefit yourself

Hey! sure where would you like to hang out?

What about the Beachwood Cafe? That man knew what he was doing and you hated it, he knew that you loved that place, especially because all your conversations there were so deep and you used to love it. Keywords used to

Sure, why not?! But you had to stay calm and collected, you couldn't show him that you were mad, that's a sign you still care about what he thinks and the way you miss your used-to-be relationship. You got ready, dressed up like normal, and remember hearing that you should dress as you do now because then your ex would see you're still the same even without them. So you took that and got ready. You got your phone and headed to your car. Driving down LA and getting the nice summer breeze. As much as you hated summer, the breeze did feel nice with your convertible car. You found a parking spot and parked getting out and going inside the cafe, seeing Sebastian, first ordering your coffee. He has been here for a while, his coffee doesn't have the steam coming out anymore, when you sat at the table, he sat up.

"Hey," you said

"Hi," he said with a small grin.

"So... why am I here?" it was starting to get awkward

"You look nice," he said

"Thank you, but why am I here? You didn't answer me" you said coldly

"I wanted to talk about what I did, I am sorry y/n/n"

"No, don't, don't call me that, and you're not sorry" you rolled your eyes.

"You moved on rather very quickly, nonetheless easily,” he said with a half-hearted chuckle, “but good for you. I know I threw away three years of us down the drain and I am so sorry." He said

"Gee, thanks for practically calling me the whore" you said sitting back on the chair crossing your arms and your eyes not making eye contact with Sebastian.

"You found a new boy. It's all over the headlines 'Y/N Y/L/N Found a New Mystery Boy?' " he said in air quotes "I don't know when you started dating that boy, a couple of weeks ago? Remember when you said you would give me the world? We planned our whole life together, all for nothing I guess." he said coldly, now he was the one who crossed his arms and didn’t make eye contact.

"No, you can't do that, I didn't move on in a 'couple of weeks it was six months since we broke up, I have been dating that man because he was there through it all, he saw more things come out of me than you have in those three years.” You started to look at him, leaning forward and talking with your hands. “I don't owe you an explanation, you were the one who cheated, I thought we would live our life together, you can’t make me out to be the bad guy when you were the one who cheated, and the whole public thinks I am in the wrong when they don't even know what happened." Then there was the gas, which will later lead to a fire.

"Well you look a lot better, I guess a therapist does help, now you can be a better girlfriend to your new boyfriend you look happy and healthy, not me If you ever cared to ask. You're doin' great out there without me, baby. God, I wish that I could do that” and that was the flame, to the fire, that will soon lead to another wildfire in Los Angeles.

"Look, you can't play the victim when you were the one who cheated on me! Or did you forget that? How was I the one who led you to cheat? I don't care about what you have to say anymore. How you cried on your bathroom floor is none of my business. if you want to take it there, I have cried every day since I saw your balls deep inside another girl. What you did is hurtful, I will never feel fully recovered." you said, your eyes were starting to water.

"Well, good for you, I guess you're gettin' everything you want. Having amazing films, getting Oscars, your book is taking off, maybe you can write about us. You bought a new car and your career's takin' off It's like we never even happened Baby, what the fuck is up with that?" He said it so coldly, it even sent shivers down your spine.

"And good for you, it's like you never even met me, remember when you swore to God I was the only person who ever got you? Well, screw that, and screw you” you retorted back

“You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do, Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy's like a wound in salt. Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all" he was now staring at you, as well as the other customers, you could see flashes in your peripheral view, the paparazzi just showed up. Now the show has really started.

"I am tired of this," you said pointing between you and Sebastian starting to get up.

"Wait- I am sorry y/n, I didn't want this to escalate so quickly"

"I know what you're doing, you're making yourself look better, so I look like the bad guy" you started to get up and head to your car. It was more difficult than people may think since there are paparazzi surrounding you. You drove around crying, you knew there were people taking pictures of you, but you didn't care that much anymore.

[dylanobrienisbatman]

The main problem with the whole mal vs the darkling thing in regards to being possessive (or really when it comes to any of their traits) is the fact that throughout, the darkling is clearly framed as the villain and his actions reflect that, whereas Mal as supposed to be the good guy and best romantic partner for Alina, and yet he has all these awful character traits and tendencies. So its less about how awful the Bad Guy is (since he's supposed to be), and more about how awful the person that we're supposed to believe is the best option for Alina is. I don't ship either, just my two cents.

Okay well... two things. First, your comment about "its less about how awful the bad guy is, since he's supposed to be", takes every comment I've made about Darkles out of context, which seems fitting since everything Darklina's spout about Mal is out of context. Him being the Bad Guy is fine, and if you like him AS A VILLAIN, and acknowledge all the bad shit he does, then my posts aren't for you. I think he's a very interesting villain, and a lot of the terrible shit he does that I have to keep making posts about make him a good villain, the problem is when the terrible shit the "Bad Guy" does is romanticized and viewed as the reasons why Alina SHOULD have picked him. So, don't assume everyone gets that "hes supposed to be awful". The point my post was making is that Darklina's love to call Mal possessive, but then turn around and act like Darkles literally enslaving her in somehow sexy and romantic. It's fucking not, and it's transparent as hell that y'all romanticize and sexualize the actually possessive character, and then project false character traits onto Mal. It's so transparent, it's almost funny.

But, more importantly, to your second, very wrong point, I wonder how much of the narrative about Mal having "awful character traits and tendencies" is actually a commentary on Mal as a character, or is it just Darklina's lying about things Mal has done and everyone accepting that misinterpretation as canon. Because, if were making a list...

Fuck boy - False! Mal was not a fuck boy! He was an attractive teenager who hooked up with consenting girls his age when he could, and he was not in a relationship during that time. Alina had never told him how she felt, so he is not beholden to her. (Also, nobody seems to have an issue with the fact that Darkles hooked up with Zoya in the show, that doesn't make HIM a fuckboy... interesting) (also also, nobody seems to discuss Darkles literally sexually assaulting Alina, and lying and manipulating her to get her to be physically intimate with him so he can use her... double interesting).

Slut Shames Alina - FALSE! The ever favourite callout line from Darklina's "He's all over you" isn't him slut shaming her. First, he has no idea what their relationship is like at that point, but more importantly, he is making an observation of her status in the little palace and how she has become his tool. He has dressed her up in his colors, made her put on a show for his benefit, and has created a situation where Alina appears to be his. Mal is noting that after months of searching for her, believing she was being hurt, tortured, or worse, when he arrives to save her, she looks like the Darkling's pet. (and, even if he WAS angry because he perceived them to be romantically involved, boy just spent months fighting for his life, lost multiple friends, and almost died to find her, all while coming to the realisation that he was in love with her, and then he shows up, after not hearing from her for months... I'd be pissed as hell too.) Important Note: He even acknowledges that what he said was wrong and tries to apologise, before Alina tells him that he was right. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 286). He also then apologizes, completely unprompted, for what he said. (Shadow and Bone, pg. 297).

Fat Shames Alina - False! This one is particularly laughable to me, because its one of the Darklina arguments that falls apart the second you actually read the scene. They are running for their lives in the forest, and Mal has to hunt and gather to feed them. He is noting that Alina's appetite has increased since he last saw her, and he makes a joke (ya know, how you do with friends) about how it would be easier to keep her fed if she still had her more meager appetite from before. He makes no comment on her weight, or her size, and he is not actually commenting on her appetite in a negative way, he is just acknowledging that it's a lot more work for him now that she eats more. Right before he says the line, the quote even proves that he isn't shaming her or thinking badly of her: "With a bemused expression, he watched as I gobbled down my portion and then sighed, still hungry". He is noting a change in her, and complaining that its made more work for him. If you think thats the same as fat shaming, well... thats a you problem.

Hates Alina's Powers - FALSE!!!! How to begin... do we talk about it was Mal's idea to hunt the stag in S&B, because he knew she needed it to be more powerful so she could stop the darkling? Do we talk about how he vowed to find the firebird for her, even though he was terrified of what all that power would do to her? Do we talk about how he literally died so she could achieve the power she needed to save the world? Or maybe we could talk about how he believed in her power more than anyone else, like when everyone was making bets about her abilities with the Cut and he knew she'd go further and better than anyone else expected her too, or when he tells her that he was never afraid of her powers, only what seeking all that power would do to her (which is literally the theme of the books, that power corrupts and seeking unmatched power can destroy you)? Mal being afraid of what is going to happen to Alina, being protective of her and worrying over her, is not the same as him hating her powers. He exists to help remind Alina of the themes of the story, and to guide her into maintaining her humanity.

Abusive - ... Do I even need to explain this one? Must I deign an explanation as to why this favourite Darklina lie is so fucking stupid, and also totally hypocrisy? No? Because we all know Darkles is actually the abusive one and they're trying to project their own shit onto Mal to further their abuse apologist agenda? Cool. Moving on.

Possessive of Alina - False! Throughout the entire series, Mal is quite literally the opposite of possessive, but yall just cant read. Not only does he quite literally step out of the way and allow Nikolai to court Alina without argument, which is the most direct example of him not being possessive, he also spends two full books believing, and repeatedly saying over and over and over, that they can't be together because he is not good enough for her. Mal believes, fully, that Alina deserves more than him, better than him, because he's just a tracker and a soldier, just a regular man with nothing to offer her but his love and his protection, and she is a Saint and should be a Queen. Possessiveness is the wish to own and control someone, it is literally the opposite of Mal believing that he's not good enough and doing everything he can to ensure that Alina achieves everything and gets everything he believes she is owed. A possessive character would not tell her to tell him to leave because he has nothing he can offer her, no title or land or country or crown. A possessive character would not promise to be the blade in her hand, because he believed he had nothing but the blood he could spill to offer her.

Angry - True! Yeah, omg, you caught us, Mal is ANGRY! Heaven forbid a teenager who is traumatized beyond belief and has to give up everything in his life, his position in the military (he deserted for her), his friends and the job he loved (Mikhail and Dubrov died for him, and he can't be a tracker in the army... because he deserted... for Alina), and, most importantly, he has to give up Alina (she should be Queen, he believes, and he has to give up the future he imagined with the girl he loves, who he was pretty sure loved him back, because she's a saint and queen and he's just a man), and more, is ANGRY. He has to be the one to find the amplifiers that he knows will end up hurting her, because thats what she needs to save the world. He has to sit by while Nikolai treats him like the dirt on his shoe and tries to woo Alina for his own personal gain (because Nikoalai did not love Alina. Maybe he came to care for her, but he proposed and spent all of S&S trying to get her to marry him when it was obvious they were not in love. He straight up says its so that the next King of Ravka can be married to the Sun Summoner. It's a power grab.) and he can't do anything about it. So yeah, Mal is angry. And yeah, sometimes he's even angry at Alina, just like sometimes she's angry at him. But they always find their way back, always apologize and try to be better for each other, and if you think anger is a toxic trait, and not simply a natural human emotion, might I suggest touching some fucking grass?

Idk why you thought I'd stand for Mal slander on my blog, cuz I will not. So, I'm gonna stop there, because I have shit to do today, but I really do wonder how much of Mal's 'toxic' or 'terrible' traits, that make him such a 'bad' love interest for Alina, really comes from Darklina's who refuse to actually read the text critically at all, and instead take everything he does and says out of context to further their agenda that Alina should have ended up as the Darkling's fucking slave forever, because thats the "girl power feminist" ending somehow. Mal supports her, loves her, sacrifices for her at every turn, and does everything he can do, to the point of literally dying for her, to ensure that she can defeat Darkles and save the world. He protects her, and when they end up happy and safe together on the orphange that they've rebuilt to help the children that were victims of Darkles war and genocide, he spends his days bringing her tea and cakes and flowers, kissing her silly under the stairs in the view of all the teachers, and calling her names like beauty, beloved, cherished, my heart for the rest of their ordinary life together, if love can ever be called that.

[khaleesiofalicante]

"My mother did not mean to hate me, she did not even know she hated me, and yet I was hated. And I carried that hate with me through life with more pride than it perhaps deserved. A bruise of honor." -I lost the author but this made me think of lbaf for some reason

My fave inmortal trio🥰🥰 love me some Ragnor being grumpy and Catrina being lovely and Magnus having an inmortality crisis around the corner kshdjdbd

I'm actually surprised that Ragnor seems to be the most calmed one here....

Max, a warlock who now knew warlock math, would finally have a purpose. how do I explain this to you, babe😔

I didn't expect to be attacked with inmortality, death and angst this early but ok :)

Alec once again being the true legend for creating the Downwolder -Shadowhunter Alliance 😎

Max is not there, is he?

It took them less than a minute to find him – with the magic of tracking and pure parental terror. Omg that scene was so stressful but the way Rafael could call Magnus and both Alec and him going immediately is making me cry 🥺

Couldn't they just...idk, kick around the seashell and get it into the portal?? It's just a suggestion!!!

Magnus knew that look.

The look of a parent who had just realized their child was gone.

Too many lbaf II flashbacks 😭😭

Me @ Hunter after he found everything was real: you must be feeling really stupid right now huh??

Honest talk, I hate the Devlins, but it must suck that he finally sees what his son saw and finally believes him, but now Marcus is dead... Shit.

Camilla better wake up from that coma or I will lose my shit ISTG-

Then Gigi had gone home hoping to talk to Camila tomorrow.

Then tomorrow had come, but Camila had not.

You can't take aways this friendship!! Please😭

That is life in this bitch of an earth 😔

GIGI AND RAFEL. I WOULD KILL FOR THIS DUO. THEY ARE JUST EVERYTHING💙💙💙

The mystery is killing me!!

I trust this precious babe with my life. You got this!!! No pressure tho...

“I still can’t believe he is dead. I feel like he is just gonna pop tomorrow and say ‘surprise, bitches’ or something.” don't tempt the fates!!!

Other Max haunts me in my sleep too. I need even the tiniest of hints🥺🥺🥺

“You’d look fucking hot with gray hair,” she said. OMFG I literally said this 10 seconds ago dkvdkdjdk

Idk why i love the nickname guapa so much. And I love that you can also use it with friends (at least I do lol) and it's so cute and fun and- ok, ok. Getting away from the point jdhdkdk

Max really took "I love a challenge" to the next level😂😂

THE DAUGHTER IS NAMED AFTER CAMILLA, RIGHT? RIGHT??? THERE IS LITERALLY NO OTHER EXPLANATION!!!

“She is a good one, isn’t she? Good friends are important, Rafael. Because good friends become family.” STOP I HAVE A SOFT SPOT FOR FRIENDS BECOMING FAMILY TROPE😭😭

Arjun and Camilla. It has to be. It makes sense. Also Arjun is amazing 🥺🥺

“It’s a privilege to be someone’s namesake,” bapak smiled. “It means someone loves you and respects you enough to want more of you in their world.” This whole thing made me emo. I can't even mention my favorite part!!! It's not fair of you to give me Lightwood-Bane fam feels in this moment 😭😭

Mallory is crazy!! I mean we all know that already but still... This family is full with psychopath holy shit!!

Hunter, this is on you for not believing your son... Idris has nothing to do with it!!

Wait, Claire knows something 🤨

Wow.

Look at them. Finally coming together. Working as a family.

Yeah... I don't thinks that's particularly healthy....

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK? WHY?? HOW?? WHAT?? SERIOUSLY LEVIATHAN???

I am stress 🙂 I better get to watch someone beat the power out of her (David👀) or I am suing!!!!

To say that I'm obsessed with that quote would be an understatement. It's so fucking on point.

Here is a song rec for you. You might know it but the live performance must be viewed for hoe reasons.

[knockknockchicagopd]

❛ OH, SHE ISN'T PLAYING ❜

❚❙ REQUEST BY @ocetevasgirl: Hola preciosa! Can I request prompt 8 from the fluff list with Voight? Love you 💖

❚❙ PROMPTS: “You're jealous, aren't you?” “You're calling that jealousy? If she/he can still use her/his legs, I'm not being jealous”.

❚❙ HANK VOIGHT MASTERLIST.

❚❙ WORDS: about 2k.

❚❙ A/N: this writing hasn’t been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I’m sorry about that. If you find a description about body or a word out of place, or something that it makes you feel uncomfortable / unrepresented, let me know by a private message and I will change it delighted.

❚❙ GIF credits: to my amazing @sonsofeorl.

❚❙ Tag list: @melblacc @rebelwrites @skyofficialxx @sesamepancakes @scarletsoldierrr @mondefantastique @that-chick212 @enbyamaro @inlovewith3 @ocetevasgirl @sophie-writes. If you want to be added to my tag list, send me a message.

Since you saw this morning Olivia Benson walking downstairs accompanied by Voight, your good mood got burned into ashes just in a sight. He hadn't told you that she was going to come and, actually, he hadn't why to tell you. For him, it's only part of his job. But you know it's something else for her. You have seen her how she looks at your man. The unjustified and unnecessary touches on his back, on his arm. The stupid smiles she draws to him, that you would be delighted of erasing using your fist.

You have never, ever, been the kind of jealous girl. You trust your boyfriend blindly, but you don't trust her. You can't. You have tried it with all your efforts, but then you heard her laughing for no reason and Hank responding with a fleeting smile. You haven't talked him about how you feel, because the age gap between both makes you look stupid sometimes. Fortunately, you're professional enough to not let these things affect your job and your relationship. You have learnt how to hide your emotions, even if sometimes your friends suspect that something is going on by the tic that makes you blink your left eye unconsciously.

Aware that he must be there with his amazing friend, Kim places a hand on your shoulder trying to encourage you to cross the entrance and come into the Molly's. Licking your lips as you calm yourself a little, you nod pushing the door to be embraced by the warm atmosphere inside it, covering you from the cold breeze of Chicago. Letting your eyes travel around the place, you greet some of your friends waving a hand, before landing your gaze on your boyfriend. He turns at that exact moment, not even trying to contain a smile. You show him another back, but his disappears when he sees you passing him away straight to the Unit's table without greeting him. And Olivia notices it, but you don't care.

“What's up, trouble?” Jay pulls down your hair, earning a laugh from you.

“Platt said you crashed a patrol”. Wrinkling your nose in a funny gesture, after Adam's words, you take a seat next to him.

“These aren't the things you have to learn from us, you know it, right?” Antonio makes you all chuckle, calling to his sister raising a finger to ask for more beers.

“I caught the bad guy, didn't I?”

“Yeah, crashing a car”. Atwater raises his eyebrows, leaning over the table.

“But I caught the bad guy, that's my job not to take care of the cars. I'm not a mechanic…”

“BUT A COP!” You all say in unison, as always, like a famous quote.

As soon as the beers arrive, you make another toast for your car lost in action. And everything is fun until you feel a presence behind you and the silence gets installed around your table. Gulping and licking your bottom lip, as your friends drink from their bottles trying to pretend that you all weren't doing what you were doing, you turn around over your stool forcing a smile.

“Having fun, officer (Y/L/N)?” Platt's voice gives you the kind of shivers you can hide.

“No, no, n— I mean… yes”. The look on her face causes you to swallow again. “I me—mean, no?”

“It's a simple question. Yes or no”.

“Trudy, leave the kid alone”.

Saved by the bell. Your hero.

“Crash a car is part of our tradition, ain't it?” Hank tries to put some humor in the situation, traveling his eyes from her to you.

“Hm”. The woman just replies, before walking away.

You don't know about what kind of tradition he is talking of, but at least he has saved your ass. Again. Not being able to look at him, you sip from your beer trembling yet. Probably, tomorrow Crowley will ask for a convincing explanation. I caught the bad guy will not work with her, that's for sure. Feeling a soft touch in your lower back, you raise your orbs from the bottle to your boss, who makes a brief move with his chin to point at the back door at the end of the bar. You don't want to go, you know exactly what it's going to happen and you just want to forget the intense day you have had. But he raises his eyebrows with that cockiness usual on him, about to drag you if you don't put down from your stool.

With an imperceptible sight, you end up obeying in silence under the attentive eyes of your friends. Hank walks behind you with both hands in the pocket of his jeans, as you wear your jacket to zip it above your chest. The fresh air hits your face once you reach the Molly's back alley, resting your back against the wall with your face bowed to your military black boots. Placing himself in front of you, he studies thoroughly your gesture, your lips pressed and the lack of eye contact.

“What's the matter?”

Shaking your head slightly, you cross one leg behind the other, putting your hands on your lower back.

“You're jealous, aren't you?”

Letting go an exaggerated chuckle, you roll your eyes before gluing them on him. “You're calling that jealousy? If she can still use her legs, I'm not being jealous”.

“It ain't a good moment to be sarcastic, sweetheart”.

“I'm not. She is just a colleague, right?”

Hank nods in silence tilting his head closer and you're sure he can hear your heart speeding up under your skin. He always does that, putting you nervous only to prove the power he has on you, on your body, on your senses. And you hate him. You hate how proud he feels because of it. The grin on his face causes a chill down your spine, standing up from the wall to pretend that he is wrong, that he doesn't control your reactions.

“Hm… Good to know you're conscious of her position. She's gonna stay in my house tonight. We didn't plan to need more than one day and she doesn't have a place”.

For a moment, the image of you punching his face runs your mind, keeping your hands inside the pockets of your jacket to close them in two fist until you feel your nails hurting your palms. There are a lot of replies to his words stuck in your throat, but if it's a proof of trust, you would fail miserably. This is a clash of titans and you're not going to let him win.

“That's fine”. You respond squinting at him, taking a step ahead almost facing Hank. “Anything else?”

“No”.

“Okay”.

With a feigned smile, you turn to the left to leave the alley and come back to your private party, which means to get drunk until Burgess and Hailey have to carry you home.

“What an interesting night is gonna be”. Hank whispers seeing you grabbing the doorknob, teasing you as only he knows how to do.

Kissing your lips as your steps stop dead, you turn your head about to lose your calm.

“If I see her putting a hand on your leg again, I'm gonna break every single fucking bone of her body”.

You couldn't help it. He knows exactly which words he has to use to push you to the edge. The worst part is the fun he usually has doing it. Walking towards you moving his head as if he was nodding, Hank caresses his bottom lip with a forefinger looking thoughtful.

“I didn't think of you as someone violent”.

“Fucking watch me, Voight”.

“Hm…”

Containing a laugh, he opens the door for you, pointing at the inside with a hand. Clearly challenging you. But before you can pass him away, the sergeant grabs your forearm to push you back and lean his lips over your ear.

“She booked the hotel yesterday”. His raspy voice touring your head makes you feel your cheeks burning in shame.

He has won already and you know it. Wanting to leave him again, he pulls you back again hearing the heavy snort escaping your mouth.

“She knows who you are. Told her this morning”.

Did really he? Arching up one of your eyebrows, you can't help but turn your face slightly at him. Your parted lips reveal the surprise and the confusion. Why can she know it, but not your friends? Just because she doesn't work in Chicago? It isn't fair. At least, under your opinion. It's not like you're going to act like Voight's girlfriend and take the advantage of what it means. But it allows you to smile at him when you cross your eyes in the hallways, it allows you to don't have to hide if you want to have lunch together, it allows you to not have to drive two different cars and leave his house before him to work. Small simple things that for you means a lot.

“Cut off the show, boss. Everybody is looking at us”.

It isn't the first time that Hank can't avoid touching you somehow in public, finding the stupidest excuse just to feel you. And he really enjoys putting you nervous, watching the way you lick your lips and bite the bottom one, feel the way your body gets tense when he lays his hands on you, the short frights he gives you coming behind you and whispering ‘officer (Y/L/N)’ in your ear.

Actually, there's no reason why you decided to hide your relationship. You haven't even talked about it. You haven't thought if it's because of the age gap, because of his past, because he is your boss (...). You haven't given it any importance, till you met Olivia Benson a couple months ago. That kind of sergeant who comes from New York and thinks that she runs the Chicago police department. Hank hasn't told you how they met, imagining they did when he was working on the Gang Unit.

“Admit your jealousy”. Tilting his head enough to look into your eyes, the challenging grimace comes back to his face.

Knowing that he's not going to stop, you simply nod. “It isn't fair that other women can… touch you, and I have to wait more than twelve hours just… simply to smile at you without looking suspicious”.

Hank can hear to perfection the hopelessness in your voice, feeling your fingers loosening his grip around your other forearm. It's not a question of possessiveness, but of insecurity; and he's discovering it now, thinking about since when you feel like that.

“Do you wan'me to take you home?”

You shake your head, now with guilt running under your skin because you know it has ruined his night.

“I'm okay, boss. Gonna have some fun with my friends after a long day”.

“Will you have some fun with your boss after that? End the night in my house playing pool, drinking whisky? I will let you win”.

You can't help but show him a fleeting smile, almost curving your lips. That's a yes for him and Hank feels satisfied. Holding your right hand on his, your boyfriend brings it to his mouth placing a tender kiss on the back of it, before letting you go.

Hailey and Burgess are squinting at you, knowing that their suspicions weren't wrong at all. Not saying a word and pretending normality, you sit back on your stool to have a sip from your beer. You're literally sweating right now, and it isn't because of the jacket you are wearing but because of the petty smiles appearing on the other cops.

“You know that we work in Intelligence, right, little trouble?” Antonio is the first one talking jokingly.

“Yeah, and we don't need to be detectives to know what's going on”. Hailey hums resting his arms over the table.

“How is Voight in private? I've always had curiosity. He takes off the stick of his ass when he comes home, or…?”

“Halstead, I can hear you”.

“Yeah, that was the intention, Sarge”. He replies, lifting up his beer in a silent toast.

Turning at Hank just for a second, you can't help but shrug with your eyebrows briefly frowned in a funny grimace that makes him giggle. It was inevitable, since they have seen the way and how close he has talked to you. But now, the pressure within your chest is dropping down, feeling better.

[marshmallow-xphile]

My thoughts on the sexuality of some of my favorite X-files characters.

I posted this in my X-files amino back in June as part of a LGBTQ pride challenge and for some reason I only just thought to post it here as well.

Fox Mulder: openly bisexual

Mulder is so open sexually that I really don't think gender matters all that much to him. He does seem to prefer females but I wouldn't be even remotely surprised if he had a boyfriend or two in the past. I don't think he's flamboyant about his sexuality but I don't think he'd hide it at all either

My evidence:

In the season one episode "Ghost in the Machine" we meet an Mulder's ex-partner, Jerry, and I absolutely feel like there is an ex-lovers vibe to the both of them. They hug upon first seeing each other, Mulder looks incredibly happy to see him, when Mulder says they worked together Jerry corrects him to say they were partners at which point Mulder looks over at Scully as if to see her reaction. Mulder has this real guilty look to him. When Jerry acts a little self conscious Mulder is real quick to jump in and reassure him. They get in each other's personal space. It just really leaves me with the impression that they care deeply for one another and broke up for other reasons, perhaps the different career goals as Mulder tells Scully.

We also have Mulder with Krycek. From the very beginning of Krycek's involvement with the X-files I feel like the writers went out of their way to make a correlation between the change in partnership and a new partner in a relationship. There is a scene in Sleepless where Mulder and Scully are on the phone and Mulder tells Krycek he'll be right there, the rest of the conversation feels reminiscent of two exes chatting about the change brought about by the new relationship. Scully even brings up that it must be nice having a partner who doesn't question his every theory.

There were many scenes in Sleepless, Duane Barry, and Ascension in which Mulder and Krycek were alone but that we never got to see who knows for example what the two of them got to talking about while they were stuck in traffic during the drive to New York in Sleepless. Or how often they hung out between Sleepless and Duane Barry.

During Mulder and Scully's partnership Mulder only called her 'Dana' on a few emotional occasions. He started casually calling Krycek 'Alex' almost immediately.

Let us not forget the infamous speedo scene. While yes it definitely showed more of a Krycek attraction to Mulder than the opposite. It does make one wonder what led him to wear such a revealing bathing suit. How many straight men do you know who wear speedos? My guess is few. How many straight men wear speedos when they can reasonably assume their male partner will show up looking for them? Not many would be guess.

And then there is their relationship after Krycek is revealed to be a traitor. They both tend to act more like scorned lovers than enemies and notice that it's Mulder, not Krycek, who cannot seem to keep his hands off the other. Seriously it's like every time Krycek shows up, Mulder immediately grabs him.

Now here's a couple quotes from Mulder,

Krycek tells Mulder he most be losing it because Krycek beat him with one hand. Mulder's immediate reaction: "isn't that how you like to beat yourself?"

When the little man in Humbug is lined up pretty much exactly with Mulder's crotch he says that Mulder would be surprised how many women find his size alluring. Mulder's immediate reaction: "you'd be surprised how many men do as well"

How many straight guys do you know comfortable enough with their sexuality to make a gay innuendo? I personally cannot think of any.

Dana Scully: bicurious

I believe that Scully is sometimes attracted to women. It definitely is not as blatant as with Mulder and I really don't think she's had any past girlfriends but I definitely think that there is an attraction.

My evidence:

In the episode "Ice" I really felt like there are a few tender moments between her and Felicity Huffman's character especially while they were examining one another for the worms. That examination had a sort of sexual energy to it I thought.

In the episode "kill switch" theres a moment where the Invisagoth asked if she could have her handcuffs removed or if she should type with her tongue. Mulder mentions that she doesn't want a vote there and the look on Scully's face and the way she licks her lips, I definitely get the impression that she would have been perfectly happy to see what Invisagoth could get up to with that tongue.

Some people point to Scully's relationship with Reyes as evidence of her bisexuality, I personally don't see any attraction there on Scully's side but I don't think its outside the realm of possibility.

Monica Reyes: Closeted lesbian

This one's probably a surprise I know there was something between here and Brad as well as a flirtation with Doggett so you would probably think she was Bisexual but honestly was either one of those even remotely convincing? To me they weren't. I believe that Reyes is a lesbian.

I kind of go back and forth on whether she's open about it. Reyes is very spiritual and open so it seems strange that she would be in the closet but maybe she has a reason, fear of it affecting her career in the FBI perhaps? It just seems strange that she keeps pursuing these heterosexual relationships she has no passion for unless she is trying to hide her true passion.

My evidence:

I admit I really have very little evidence but look at the relationship between Reyes and Brad Follmer. It had all the chemistry of two people who got really drunk once and cannot remember sleeping together. I don't for a second believe she was ever in love with Brad nor he in love with her.

Then you've got the same thing between her and Doggett. Yes the writers were obviously trying for a romantic angle with the two of them but to me it never came across as convincing. It seemed more like she thought of him as a good friend and figured she might as well date him, I saw no evidence of love or attraction.

On the other hand look at her and Scully. While I feel like the attraction there was one sided I definitely feel like Reyes was into Scully or Dana as she would call her. Reyes was willing to risk her life for Scully and yes that is her job after all but Reyes seems to take that above and beyond and it's not just Scully herself but also William. Look at how protective Reyes is of William in The Truth and of the sacrifice Scully made in giving him up. She seems to care even more than Mulder on that.

Cigarette-Smoking-Man: Asexual

CSM has probably had sex at some point, he is of course the father of at least three children but I do not think that he was ever in love with any of these women or even attracted to them. I believe they were all just a means to an end.

I believe that CSM's only love was for his cigarettes

Evidence:

There is a little bit of evidence that he might have actually felt something for Teena Mulder but I don't buy it. He freely admits that he felt nothing for Cassandra Spender but he must've been convincing if he got her to marry him and we have seen him fake emotions more than once. He also seemed to show an attraction to Scully in En Ami but that too was just a means to an end. Perhaps he does feel something towards all the women he has impregnated but I wouldn't call it love. I don't see any real attraction there either. My bet is that CSM needed some "help" in order to produce his offspring.

Alex Krycek: Gay

While Krycek did have an obviously sexual relationship with Marita Covarrubias he definitely didn't have any real feelings for her and I don't buy attraction either. No I'd say they were both just trying to use sex to get what they wanted. His anger at finding the Russian boy gone wasn't because he was heartbroken at her betrayal. Merely mad that she'd managed to get the upper hand.

Whether Krycek is open or in the closet I'm not sure, I'm thinking it probably depends on the mission hes on at the time.

Evidence:

Of everyone on this list I'd say Krycek is the one I'm the most sure of. There is no doubt in my mind that Krycek was attracted to, perhaps even in love with, Fox Mulder. From the very beginning there appeared to be a bit of longing in his eyes.

There was the speedo scene wherein Krycek was definitely checking Mulder out. There were several scenes where Krycek could've killed Mulder but chose to help him instead.

As I've seen pointed out before, Krycek's crazy motivational choices don't make any sense at all unless it's all in an effort to be around Mulder more.

Look at his sense of style and his obvious love for lip gloss. I am not saying that straight men cannot love lip gloss and dress themselves in Krycek's fashion but it is uncommon and it was especially so back in the 90s

The infamous kiss in The Red and the Black could certainly be explained away as some kind of Russian custom but it isn't one that I am aware of and he hasn't really shown any other signs of his Russia heritage.

I would say my best evidence of Krycek's sexuality is in Essence and Existence, just look at the look on Krycek's face when Mulder trusts him to protect Scully. Krycek knows what Scully means to Mulder and then look at how seriously Krycek takes the job! I definitely feel like that moment meant a lot to him and he would have protected Scully with his life for Mulder.

There's also the fact that Krycek's unwillingness to kill Mulder lead to his own death.

Of course asking Skinner to shoot Mulder goes against this theory but I do have a couple thoughts on that, the most sensical being that he knew there was no chance Skinner would shoot Mulder and he probably knew there was no chance he would survive anymore. Maybe he made that request in hopes of sparing Mulder any pain he might have otherwise felt at his death (I know it's a bit of a stretch but my other theories require a long explanation of my thoughts on where the series had planned to go next)

The lone gunmen: no one knows....not even them

Three (I don't count Jimmy for this) single adult men who all live together in very cramped quarters and are, at least in Langley's case, perfectly happy to be around each other without thier clothes on certainly makes it seem like there's something between them all but I really don't get a overtly gay impression with any of them, even Langley who as mentioned doesn't like to wear pants and is the only one who hasn't had a love interest. They just have this sort of Vegas-esque thing. "What happens in the bachelor pad/newspaper room stays in the bachelor pad/newspaper room.

I would love to hear other people's thoughts on these and any other X-files characters you think might be somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum.